Dead Dreams
by Dante Maryam
Summary: Karkat Is Sick Of Dave. He Is Sick Of Terezi. Well, Sick Of Loving Her. He Hates Watching Her And Dave Grow Closer, And When He Hears Terezi Call Dave Her Matesprit, He Fucking Loses It.


Dreams

A Dave X Terezi(Karkat) Sadstuck

By: DanteM. Hagan

It sucked, watching someone I loved fall into the arms of another man. Or in my opinion, a idiotic, insufferable, cool-kid, pricks arms. But, I guess my opinion doesn't matter. It's not like me hating him could change anything. I knew it wouldn't to. But not hating him isn't going to change anything either. So, I guess it doesn't matter if I hated him or not. It never has changed anything before. So why would it change anything now? Well, either way, I hate him, and there is nothing that could change that. I just wanted to know what she saw in him. How could anybody like somebody like him? He is always wearing sunglasses. I have no clue why. He always says that it is for **ironic** purposes. I still highly doubt that he even knows the definition of irony. He uses it every time he does something completely stupid or something that makes not a single moment of sense. I seem to be the only one to even notice it. Everybody else just seems to go with it like they think that he is using it correctly. I even asked him why he is always wearing sunglasses before and his exact words were, "because dude, it's ironic,". I mean, how is that even ironic? He just wears them to wear them. That is not ironic at all. Another thing about him is that he is always making up stupid raps. Or as he calls them, "**Sick Fires"**. It still pisses me of, his moronic excuses for poetry. He just makes a mockery out of the fine art of it. But, there is sadly nothing I can do about it. All I can do is watch as he spits on the fine art of poetry, acts like an insufferable prick, and steal the girl I have been trying to get for just about all my life. It really kills me. I still find the question, how can somebody even remotely like him, constantly beating in my head. Sometimes when I sit alone in my ritesblock, I think about him and Terezi. Once I even began to cry about it. I still don't know why. I guess it is because it just hurts me to watch it. Hurts me enough to make me cry apparently.

It was early morning. I hadn't gotten the chance to sleep because the fucking Mayor kept knocking cans all over the damned place. It was way to fucking loud. Did he even sleep? I guessed not. I wish he could give it a rest for one night. But I doubt he would listen. I don't even think he can understand English, much less speak it. He just made odd noises and hand movements. It was very weird. But most of the time I could get what he was asking me to do. Or understand what he was explaining. Terezi and Dave were in the room with him. The room where they kept, "Can Town" as they called it. Fucking ridiculous. Terezi was drawing something on the floor with chalk, while Dave and they Mayor were building something out of cans. I was standing in the doorway, watching them with a sad look on my face. Okay, I was watching Terezi, not the other two. Every once and a while I would sigh, kind of hoping somebody would hear me. But nobody did. After a few minutes, Dave spotted me watching them. He gave me a confused look, then got up to confront me. He was still wearing his sunglasses and his Godtier outfit. His cape hung down and off, reaching just below the back of his knees. His hair was a light blonde, almost white. I couldn't tell what his eyes looked like, for obvious reasons. He walked up to me, standing just taller than me, but still didn't have to look down. I was still slouched against the door frame. He spoke, "What's up, Grumpy?" I hated the fucking nicknames that everyone made up for me, specially his. They were always something about me being angry or mad, or some variation of that. So, I came back with an insult as usual. "Nothing much, Fuckass. Just watching you be an insufferable prick as usual." "Seriously bro. Are you ever going to stop with this, 'fuck you Dave Strider, I hate you in every way possible' bullshit?" "It's not bullshit if it's true." "No. Even if it's true, it's still bullshit. You know that you love me. Weather it be as a friend or something more, you do." I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Did he seriously think I liked him more than a friend? I don't even think of him as a friend in the first place. "Fuck off. There is only one person that I like more than a friend. That person is most definitely not you." "Then who is it?" "That's none of your motherfucking business!" I snapped, pushing a finger in his face. "Awwww. Does the wittle Karkat have a crush on somebody? How cute." "Alternia to Dave fuckass! If it were 'little' do you really think I would be this bothered about it?" "Haha."

I ripped a sickle from my sylladex, pressing it to his neck. "I suggest you watch your mouth Strider. You could get very hurt by using a poor choice of words." "Dude. Not cool." Becoming more angry, I pressed down harder, just tearing some of his skin. Causing a small bleeding. At that point, Terezi ran over to us. Probably smelling the candy red blood. "KARKAT! What the hell are you doing!?" I didn't notice she was there until she yelled. Looking away from Dave, I looked into her eyes. Well, I tried. She was wearing red tinted glasses. Why was everyone wearing glasses? I looked at her and said nothing, pressing slightly harder every few seconds. "Karkat! Answer me!" I looked at the ground and back at Dave. There was a thin line of blood falling down his neck and to the floor. Snarling, I pulled away, retracting my sickle. I tried to walk away but Terezi grabbed me before I could get far. "AUGH! GET OFF ME!" I yelled as loud as I could. I knew that Dave, Terezi, The Mayor, and I were the only ones here. But I still felt the need to. I shoved her off onto the ground and ran as fast as I could for my ritesblock. She chased after me, but over the past year and a half I got a lot of running exercise. I tripped over a piece of stray chalk and let out a scream. "Son of a bitch!" She caught up to me, huffing as she stopped over me. "Damnit, Karkat. What the hell was that back there?" I got up and tried to run away again, but she tackled me back to the ground, pinning me there so I couldn't move. "Get. The. Fuck. Off of me!" I yelled at her, thrashing around, hoping to make her lose her grip. She held me down tightly, not even starting loosen her grip. "Not until you tell me what that was about back there. You could have killed him you know." I relaxed, but still very angry. "Who's to say that wasn't my intention?" "If you wanted to kill him you would have. But you didn't, so there was another reason." She gave me a frustrated look. I shot it back at her, trying to move my arms away, but no luck. "Get the fuck off of me." "Not until you answer my question." I yelled back at her, "It's none of your god damned business!" "You almost killed my matesprit, I think it's my business." At the sound of her calling him, her matesprit, I got wide eyed. My eyes began to turn red and they swelled up. I still kept an angry look on my face as a tear shed. "Get. The. Hell. OFF OF ME!" I shot up and shoved her to the floor, running back in the direction of my ritesblock. She was still running after me as fast as she could. Yelling at me to stop. I just kept running until I reached the door. I slammed through, shutting and locking the door behind me. I leaned against the door, and slid down it. I just crouched there, tears running down my face. Soon, Terezi reached my door and began knocking on it. I ignored the knocks, and continued blocking it. After a minute or two of knocking she stopped. I knew she was still there because her shadow was peering through, under the door.

She heard my crying and just stood there. After a while, she spoke in a soft voice, "Karkles?" She was using that stupid pet name she gave me. I hated it so much, but I responded anyway. "What?" I said it slowly, making stupid crying noises in between the sounds. She still spoke in a soft voice, "Are, are you okay?" I honestly thought she was kidding. I was sitting here, crying like a wriggler, and she wanted to know if I was okay? Of course I wasn't okay! "Do I sound okay to you?" She acted like I was being serious, and not sarcastic. "No. You sound like you're really hurt." I almost rolled my eyes at the response. After a minute, I opened the door to my ritesblock and responded. "No fucking shit. I thought you were a motherfucking detective or some ridiculous crap like that? If you were, you would know that I am." She looked at me, looking worried about me. Disregarding the insults. "What's wrong then? I want to help you." I couldn't believe what I was hearing. She wanted to help me? I still doubted that. "You think you can help, but all you can do is take away." I had heard that in a romcom. Why did I say it? I had no clue. "What are you talking about Karkles?" There is was again, that annoying nickname. I tried to ignore it. "Is it not blatantly obvious? All you can do is hurt me from here on. Helping is out of your reach. There is only one thing that could help me, but you can't give me that. Nobody can. It was possible before, but now. Now, it's just a dream. A dream that has been thrown down and smashed to millions of motherfucking pieces. Smashed beyond repair." She gave me a confused, but still sympathetic look. "I, I don't understand." Of course she didn't. Nobody did. "I know you don't. I only have two goals from now on. But, one disagrees with the other. Making only one possible. But, I have already chosen. And I am going to stick with it." At that note, I shut the door and went into my bedroom. I crashed down, and shut my eyes, trying to get some sleep.

The next morning, I woke to the sound of someone at my door. I lazily got up and opened it. To my surprise, it was Dave. Not looking pissed at all. I snarled at him. "What the fuck do you want?" He just gave me a stupid smile. "Chill bro. Terezi told me what you said to her. I still don't understand it. But, I want to help you complete those goals you were talking about." I thought for a moment, then remembered what I had said. "Augh. You really want to help with those? Then, one; fuck off. And two; fuck off." I tried to slam the door in his face, but he held it open. "Come on bro. As uncharacteristic of me as it sounds, I seriously want to put all this bullshit in the fire and burn it into the past. Creating a brand new future. Filled with the epic friendship between the coolest human, and the leader of the trolls." "I don't think that the stupidity in your brain can comprehend the amount of times I have to tell you to go away, to actually get you to do it. Why do you care in the first place? You have been pissed off at me before, and I never gave a shit. I just stopped giving a damn for a while before getting back to it. What is the problem with you doing the same? If you had a think-pan that was smart enough, you would realize the problem, and you would probably not give a living hoof-beast shit. You would also realize that there are only a select few ways to fix it. In fact there are only two! One being impossible, and the other being still exceedingly difficult for me. Still making you put effort into it, but still hard for me." "Bro, stop monologueing and just tell me what these two ways to fix this shit are. I will do my best to help." "Fine! God be damned if I could keep shit to myself anymore. Okay, one way is for me to, in some bullshit convoluted way that will include fucking making a complete mockery of myself, somehow get TZ t-" "Is that what this is about, Terezi? Bro, if this is about her, I can't help you." "Which is what I was trying to explain to you before, you pathetic excuse for a Knight Of Time!" "Okay. But just for more information, what is the problem with her?" "What is the problem," I spoke in a sarcastic voice. "The motherfucking problem is that you are her god damned matesprit you waste of a life!" "My matesprit?" "Yes! The person who she spends all her damn time with, filling pails and having fucking sloppy makeouts! Her god damned matesprit!" "You mean her boyfriend?" "SURE! WHY NOT? WHATEVER YOU ASSHOLES CALL IT!" I glared at him with an angry look, but as mad I was trying to be, a tear trickled down my face. "Dude. Are you fucking crying?" "What does it look like fuckass?" "I have to say that you are being a fucking pansy about this shit." "Fuck off!" I kicked him in the stomach, knocking him backwards so I could shut my door.

The next day I decided to get some sickle training in. So I headed down to the training room and began swiping at wooden dummies, practicing my maneuvers. I was trying out some new techniques, I thought I had the hand of one, but while doing it I cut a long, thin mark in my face. "Son of a bitch." I stated, leaving the room to go wash and bandage my face. After washing my face, I decided to leave it unbandaged. The bleeding stopped so I figured it didn't matter. As I was leaving the washroom, I ran into Terezi. Son of a bitch. I tried to walk around her but she blocked my way. "Can you move please?" I tried to sound angry, but it came out almost sad. "What happened to your face Karkles?" Again with that fucking pet name. "I cut myself while training. So what?" "You should be more careful. Wouldn't want a bigger accident than this." I rolled my eyes, trying to move around her. She continued to block my path. "Can you get the fuck out of my way?" She stared at my shirtless chest. I had taken off my shirt so I wouldn't get it wet while washing my face. "No. I like it here." I scowled. "Seriously. What the fuck do you want?" "Jesus, Karkles. Wha-" "Stop calling me fucking, 'Karkles'. It's annoying and retarded." "What's wrong with you today, Karkl- Karkat? You seem more pissy than usual." "What's it to you? So I'm angry. Big motherfucking deal. I always am." "Yeah. But, for a while you have been a bigger ass that usual." "What are you getting at Pyrope? If you have a point make it. I don't really have time for this hoof-beast shit." "My point is that you have been more angry lately. Is it because of what happened the other day?" At the mention of what happened, I gritted my teeth. "What if it is? Like you give a flying fuck." "But I do. I want you to be happy. But seeing you like this just sucks." "We both know that my happnies died with my dreams. There is no point in pushing this shut further." "If you could tell me what your dreams were, maybe I could help?" "No. You couldn't. My dreams are dead. Smashed to motherfucking pieces. Broken like the fucking logic of life. Disrupted like a insufferable prick playing shitty music and making up shitty rhymes while I'm trying to watch or read something." "Okay, okay. I get the point. But I still want to know what your dreams at least were." "If I told you, I would hate myself more than I already do." "Stop with this shit. Just tell me, please." I let out a long sigh. "For fuck sake fine." I proceeded to explain to her about my dreams. My dreams of her becoming my matesprit, and possibly at some point raising a family of some sort. The way humans do. How I have loved her the way I do most of my life. All of that crap. She gave me an opened mouth look. Then, after a minute or two, spoke slowly. "Karkat...I-" "You don't have to say anything. In fact, I'd rather that you didn't. I would like to walk away with some dignity within myself." With that, she just looked down, shifting so I could leave. I walked past her, my head held high, trying to keep the tears within myself. Knowing that my dreams, could never become a reality. Knowing that, they could only be what they were called. Dreams.


End file.
